Guess who's back?!?!

Just before preparing for bed this evening, I checked my email and to my surprise, I received the following message.

Hello my dear Jason.

It is pleasant to me to know, that in the world there is a person for whom my destiny and my future are of great importance. I did not feel such care from other people. It seemed to me, that in this bad world I am necessary to nobody. I thought, that I the most lonely and unfortunate woman in the world. At night I often cried... To me is sad to recollect my life before our acquaintance to you. Now in my life there is a person whom I love all heart. And I am ready to use the best efforts to be near to you. I can leave the house and the country to be together with you for ever. I am ready to make all for the sake of our love.

It seemed to me, that my angel the keeper has forgotten about me. But your kindness and you have woken in me other person! You have forced me to look at the world absolutely on another, you have brought in my life more than bright paints and pleasure. I very much would like to tell to you all these words personally, but simple silly words cannot explain my relation to you to the full. My eyes will more clearly tell to you about everything when I will glance in your eyes. Not be upset, if my letter seemed to you little bit sad. Simply understand me - round me there were people, but I was lonely in the soul, and now I have a person for whom I am not afraid to seem such what I am actually. Huge to you thanks for it!!! I absolutely free in the soul! I have again found happiness! I have found happiness thanks to you. I send you a kiss and when you will read my letter, you receive it in the lips :-) I miss very strongly on you.

Your Alla.

She's got some great ones in there - some stuff I may actually add into my repertoire for future use.

• I can leave the house and the country to be together with you for ever.

Perhaps I'll tell her that I'd like to leave the house as well, but that I'm grounded for two weeks?

• Huge to you thanks for it!!!

Did she just call me "huge"...?

• I send you a kiss and when you will read my letter, you receive it in the lips :-)

Awww... that's sweet!!

Ok - actually, if I didn't know any better and as I jumble the words around to make sense of what has been written, it would seem like this was a very lonely person who was really happy to hear from me again.

Since I know better, I guess I'll just keep having fun with it.  :)